I taste like lemon, my nails are petroleum blue and I have Robertson’s Syndrome, which means I inexplicably get heavier in water. When I’m anxious the head nurse puts me in the upright bathtub in the old bathroom that she still has a key to. After a few hours the castor oil on my fingertips has worn off and I start seeing blue birds perched on the rusty pipes. Aerial7 headphones, from US$ 49.99
2009-2012: The Ultimate Triangulation of the Eschaton has been initiated by Japanese producers looking for the $250 million drum sound in a Copenhagen studio, slurping Yum-Yum soup, sound-replacing and EQing while a Samsung LCD silently delivers images of Gaza on the wall. The only other light is from the Lampe Triogène, € 199.- & € 299.-, will be manufactured if it receives enough votes on myfab.com
00:00:00 There is only one way out. Standing in mountain pose in the middle of the attic, one candle burning, the twin signs EVIL/EXIT flickering above the door. 00:00:01 A voice whispers, “The time is now.” Wireless Hidden Camera Exit Sign, from US$ 349.–
You have assimilated into the human race by way of observing 1960s Italian movies and earthly humans on weekends. The nanoreactive creator onboard your craft fashioned a human body for your sidereal formless self. Now for the practicality of clothing in this host body: you have yourself ported down to Manhattan at night where you stealthily break through the feeble locking mechanisms in select Soho shops and clothe yourself. The torso garment of choice is a cashmere/silk strap sweater by Unconditional. You find the strap to be a useful tool in order to show or conceal your torso scruff depending on situations when you must lure another being via the wiles of human sexuality. You feel prepared to infiltrate and free the brethren that are still locked away deep within Ameroeuro complexes. They all thought in 2012 a portal would open and a new era of visitation would begin. Little did they know the visitations have occurred for thousands of years and the date of singularity is really the prophecy of freeing the brethren from the neo-masonic canopic prisons of the Supreme Golden Order Of The Illuminati. Unconditional cashmere/silk strap sweater, US$ 224.- from Oak
You couldn’t find the obscure French Eowave guitar pedals in Pigalle that you were sent to locate so you decided to take the métro to Pyramides and look for all things Triangular. While you see the signs everywhere in the world you are peaked upon picking up a copy of Japanese Mens Non-No Magazine while your wife gets sucked into a Totoro vortex at the Japanese bookstore. Casually flipping your interest suddenly becomes peaked. Yes, it is a t-shirt. Yes, it has a triangle. Yes, it has a double-neck lap-steel guitar. Perfection? Perhaps it’s the moment of playing the instrument or is it the triangle? Really it’s the small things in life – a nicely fitted cotton tee and even the tone of a pre-WW2 magnet in the pickup of a vintage lap-steel guitar. This may be it, or at least a step towards the truth in unlocking certain mysteries of universal architecture. Perfection t−shirt by Tass Standard. ¥ 8,925
